Saturday, May 8, 2010

Trust

I'm one of those people that wants and needs to be prepared. I want to be armed with information and knowledge. So, I've been reading blogs, books and talking to friends about adoption, about attachment, about special needs. But, doing all this preparation is REALLY scaring me.

Of what you asked? Pretty much EVERYTHING!
  • that we won't know how to parent her
  • that she will be MORE SCARED than us and what does scared look like in a 15-36 month old?
  • that she won't love us. I know that sounds terribly selfish ... but the reality is she MAY NOT love us, definitely at first, but even later... and we need to be prepared for that.
  • that our bio kids will have difficulty adjusting
  • of leaving my bio kids for 14-16 days to travel to China!!!!!
  • that she will have physical and emotional needs that we won't have the first clue how to help with.
...and the list goes on and on.

It's not like this is the first time I'm thinking about these things... it's just that sometimes I'm optimistic that I can deal with it all... and other times... well, not so much.

We aren't perfect parents. In fact, most of the time, we have no idea what we are doing.

But, we must trust that He will provide us with the skills necessary to deal with the needs, whatever they may be, of ALL of our children.

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." ~ Proverbs 3:5,6





2 comments:

  1. You beat me to the post. :-) Same thoughts
    and fears run through my head now and then.
    But as you said, He will guide as and give
    us what we need as we bring these little ones
    home and into our families. :-)

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  2. I so remember having all of those same fears. As I read all the books and information on adoption/attaching in adoption I became so afraid. The coolest thing about adoption...is that if God has called you to it...He will give you all the tools you need to raise this sweet baby. He knows exactly who your child will be..and has since the beginning of time! It is He who will give you the wisdom, grace, patience and love to raise this little one!!

    I am so thankful that we did all the preparation that we did. I think I would have completely freaked out had I not known about some of the issues ahead of time. I knew that so many of the behaviors that S-girl displayed were normal and was able to address them as they arose. Going into it knowing that she doesn't love us..hasn't ever seen anything like us...and that attachment will take time..was so helpful!! I will tell you that adoption was and is one of the biggest blessings in our lives. S-girl fits perfectly in our family. We are so thankful for her!

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