Preparing {myself} for "Cool"

Next week, is going to be rough.

I’m just not prepared.

Braden starts his last year of elementary school.

I could swear he was just in preschool.

 (Sept 2005- 3 years old)

Happily carrying his little backpack to preschool, wearing his little size 8 toddler velcro sneaks.  Now he has folders labeled "science", "math", "social studies" and "composition".   I have prepared him that if he needs help with his math homework these year... he better look elsewhere besides me. 

and his feet...they are as big as mine.

Kailey will be in 2nd grade this year. SECOND GRADE!!!!!!

(April 2006 - 2 years old)

Devin starts Kindergarten.

(December 2007 - 12 months)

He will ride a bus to school with Braden and Kailey. This will be the first year he won’t spend at least one day a week with his Grandparents. Because he’s gonna be in school! 

But, oh man, is he so ready to go to school. I keep saying to him… “I can’t believe you are going to school!” …. his response… “Oh Mom, it’s not THAT big of a deal”.

Oh yes it is.

Yes. It. Is.

As if that wasn’t all bad enough…

Grace.

My not-even-three-year-old baby girl.

(February 2011 - 17 months) 

We be heading off to preschool at the elementary school (instead of our super warm, cuddly, cozy, safe church-based preschool program). She is going to attend our town’s early intervention preschool program where she will get more intensive speech services.

I hope it’s the right choice. I’m still not so sure.

And to make matters worse… she will be riding a little mini-bus there everyday.

That means… I have to put her on the bus. And kiss her goodbye. And watch the bus pull away as it takes my not-even-three year-old baby girl to school.

I think I may seriously need someone there to scoop me off the ground as I fall into a puddle of tears.

I’m pray that this is going to be OK for Grace. That she will somehow understand what is going on.

She knows she is going to school. She has her new monkey backpack. And her new Minnie Mouse lunch box. She even has an "I LOVE Minnie Mouse" folder to put in her backpack.

Every day she asks if today is the day for “Cool” (School). But, I’m not so sure she realizes that when she gets on the bus… I’m not going with her. Or that her security team of Braden, Kailey and Devin will not be in her classroom with her.

But....But.... But.... I say...

She was just sleeping in a crib three weeks ago.

She still wears a pull-up to bed.

She needs her blanket by her side for comfort. 

She is MY BABY! 

I think the transition from baby/toddler to preschooler has been so much more difficult for me this time around.  I think it's cause I missed out on the first 17 months.  Even though I've LOVED her far before I even knew her,  I have only been able to cuddle with her for 18 months... that means I should have another 18 before sending her off to preschool.    Don't ya think?! 

Sigh. I can’t handle it.

Notice I say I can’t handle it. Truth is… SHE is probably going to be just fine.